Take Your Child To Work Day...or bore the hell out of some kids who used to think Daddy's job was cool

We arrive at my cubicle an hour before the festivities are set to begin. So while I try to get a bit of work done before its time to go and meet with the coworkers who also dragged their offspring to the office on Fri, I encourage my son to draw on the big dry-erase board that hangs in each of our cubes of capitalism. He decides he's going to draw the picture that I have as a desktop on my pc...which is my tattoo:



So he draws the outline circle on the board. Its not a bad circle, a little oblong on the bottom right side, but really not bad for a freehand circle of a 7-year old. He steps back, taps me on the shoulder and says, "Look at my circle."

"Not bad," I reply.

"No. Not bad at all. Its looks like a perfect circle, which is almost good enough for me."

My son has the most incredible ways of slapping me in the face with accidental philosophy.

The remainder of the day at work was filled with women coworkers cooing over how adorable my son is, how he looks just like me, how hyper he is, how funny he is...blah blah blah, stuff I'm used to hearing by now. I understand that all of that is going to be said and will continue to be said...but c'mon people, think just a little bit. Are you really that surprised? I mean, doesn't a child usually look like his parents - boys like fathers, girls like mothers? You know that we've heard all of that, and in those exact words that you're using right now. Be original. Mention something off the wall that you noticed: "Wow, your son makes the weirdest noises when he's annoyed" (it doesn't take much to annoy him...he is my son). And if you can't be original, at least be creative, "Damn, Carter...how much did the gov't pay you to volunteer for a cloning project?"

Its quite sad, now that I think about it...people are unimaginative, mindless drones. I think we should come up with a scientific way to classify the level of droneness of the masses. Maybe a scale, like 1-5 or a color code system...everyone level GREEN or darker are so stripped of cognitive uniqueness that they don't qualify as humans. They don't deserve equal wages, equal freedom...fuck it...lets just kill 'em.

Wait...no...not a color code system...I'm color blind.

Its not that damn funny, Cowboy!

I don't have anything specific to write about. Work is work...its not exciting at all. They've finally opened a few positions up for my friends to get hired on permanant...but those are their stories, not mine. Although, in the midst of all this, there is the possibility for a promotion for myself...but whatever. My boss has been on my ass like a pair of whitey-tighties, so the prospects are not looking particularly bright. Fucking corporate assholes.

I just got done reading a book called "The End of Faith" by an author whose name I can't recall...don't worry Mr. Storyteller, I don't even remember the name of the dude who wrote that book in your hotel nightstand. But its a fan-fucking-tastic book. I'm not gonna give you a full synopsis of the book...but I think this paraphrased excerpt should give you a good idea: The state of the world is kinda like if instead of arguing over which religion's God(s) was the creator of the universe and the author of the moral law of humanity, we were arguing over Star Wars...which is better, Jedi or Sith? Blaster or Lightsaber? Empire or Rebellion? Padme or Leah? Both scenarios are retarded. In fact...I did a poor job of paraphrasing. That quote is in the beginning of the book and its been a month at least since I read that part. I'll come back and edit it later. Deal with it.

Basically it proports that we need to get rid of the irrationality that allows us to trust in such illogical and unfounded beliefs that are the foundation of religion, at which are the heart of divisiveness and hatred and intolerance. We will not survive as a species unless we do otherwise. I happen to agree. Once you can suspend logic to accept one belief, its not hard to expand that. We have always done this...from the beginning of recorded history there is proof among proof among proof of this. It is only now dangerous to our survival because of the emmense power of our weapons and the proliferation of those weapons among the ignorant and zealous among us.

The problems of this country are the problems of the world. The problems in our cities are the problems of this country. The problems of our homes are the problems of our cities. The problems of our lives is the problems of our homes. The problem of our minds, our hearts, our souls are the problems of our lives. There is no greater cause than that of the intelligent, rational search for the truth. Until we individually and collectively charge ourselves with that aim, we will continue to flounder in superstition, stand divided along imaginary lines, and hate the person standing on the other side of that line.

This is the shit I do at work sometimes...instead of work. I regurgitate the thoughts of great people whose names have long been forgotten, erased, and suplanted by the names of the mediocre who take the credit. It seems more rewarding than making sure that all of the Pizza Huts in a give city are arranged correctly in the fucking yellow pages.